BEING A NEW MUSLIM IN A FAMILY OF NON-MUSLIMS
at www.CONVERTSTOISLAM.com
Your family are not at all religious and cannot understand
why you would
want to become religious.
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It is sad when people feel that religion is not important. I cannot understand how any
person could be content to go through life and not think about what comes after their
death. Some people are happy to live for today and not worry about tomorrow. Unfortunately
this then leads them to question other people who do have a religion. They wonder why
religious people bother to waste their time with religion, they think that time spent
performing religious duties could be spent in a 'more enjoyable' way. They cannot see the
spiritual gains in religious actions.
There are also people who like to 'put down' others who are religious because they
themselves are scared. They think that there might be something in religion, they wonder
if perhaps there is a God and a point to life. But as they have not bothered to make any
investigations for themselves they do not like to be reminded of the fate that they suspect
might await them. If they are not looking into religion, despite their doubts, then they
do not want anyone else to either.
Of course there is always hope with all people. Many individuals have no interest in
religion, then a spark is ignited within them, and through the Mercy of Allah (swt)
they are guided.
If your family are of the second category then at least you have something more to work with. If your family
think that there might be something in religion, but have not made any attempt to find out,
then perhaps you now have the opportunity to help them. You could perhaps explain how you
found religion, the books you read, the people you spoke to. What was it that convinced
you about Islam? I think you need to take a soft approach, if possible let them find out
some information for themselves. If you go in 'all guns blazing' then this may just add to
their guilt that they haven't looked into religion themselves, and they may feel anger
towards you. A gentle approach, asking them what they think and getting them to give
their opinion on matters, I think would work best. InshaAllah they will develop their own
interest in religion and then in time start to feel very relieved that they are now acting
upon the thoughts that they had previously been battling against.
If your parents are of the first category, ie just can't see the point in religion, then you
could try to make them understand that there is a point. This may need to start with
proving to them that God does exist. This is really too much to get into now, but there are
many websites that could help with this quest. Please contact ZAYNAB5@AOL.COM if you would
like to be pointed in the right direction.
Of course your parents, despite your hard efforts, may still be uninterested in religion,
and may still be unhappy at your choice to be a muslim. In this situation we suggest that
you try and point out to them that your new religion does not change who you are. They still
have their son or daughter that they always had. In many ways your parents have gained,
please refer to 'Duty to Parents' and 'Treatment of Non-Muslims' in the previous solution.
Just because you are now a muslim, you are still you. There will now be some things that you
will start to do that you never did before, and there will be some things that you stop
doing that you used to do, but that is all.
Perhaps make them understand that you have everything to win and nothing to lose. You
could tell them that if you are right, then living your life as a muslim will earn you
a reward inshaAllah. If you are wrong, then you have still enjoyed a good life, and you
have lived your life to a very high moral level, what is the objection here?
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